GUILT JUDO
Rachel Kadish
“…A college buddy of mine—Jewish, though not a
descendant of survivors—once observed that his family dynamics
follow the rules of a sport: Guilt Judo. The sport requires a range
of moves: arm-twists, throws, the art of the pin. Grace and style
matter, and it is of course imperative to master that most fundamental
skill: learning to fall without injury.
Oh. You’re home.
No, it’s just that I thought you’d be home an hour
ago.
It’s okay, it’s just that the dinner got dry and ruined
in the oven. And your uncle went home. He was upset not to see you,
though he didn’t want to let on. So tell me, how was
your drive?
To play successfully, my friend maintained, you need to understand
the rules. Family obligations pin the needs of single people.
The needs of the elders pin the needs of the young (except
when said
young are infants). Safety pins punctuality. (Q: Why
were you late? A: I wanted to come earlier, but the roads
were wet…I just
didn’t want to take the chance.) You get the idea.
The Holocaust pins everything…”
Rachel Kadish is the author
of the novel From a Sealed Room. Her short fiction and essays have
appeared in Story, Zoetrope, Prairie Schooner, Tin House, and Bomb,
and have been anthologized in the Pushcart Prize collection and
elsewhere. She has won fellowships from the NEA, the Bunting Institute,
and the Massachusetts Cultural Council, and was the 2004 Koret
Foundation Writer in Residence at Stanford University. Her new
novel, titled Love, is forthcoming from Houghton Mifflin in 2006.
She lives outside Boston.